Smittens cat treats

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Valentine’s Day Advice by Adorapurr
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Sherlock Herms in Mrs. Shallowford’s Ghost – The Conclusion
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Sherlock Herms in Mrs Shallowford’s Ghost – Part 5
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Sherlock Herms: The Case of the Dancing Ghosts – Part 2
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Sherlock Herms in His 1st Big Caper: The Case of the Dancing Ghosts

Valentine’s Day Advice by Adorapurr

Hi Everyone. It’s me, Dori. *wavy paws!* Tomorrow is Valentine’s Day, and I’m here to tell you, Valentine’s Day is all about Womance.

Womancing your hoomon, that is.

When your hoomon feels loved and appweciated, he or she rewards you with belly rubs, ear scritches and extra tweats, like my most favorite tweats in the world, Smittens.

Not that I’m saying you should womance your hoomon because you want something in return…

No wait. That is what I’m saying.

Anyway! Womance is a balancing act of Action and Gift-giving.

Actions speak louder than words. For example…spraying her coat will have her thinking of you for a long, long time.

Serenade him. Sing the song of your people at dawn. Get a fursib to accompany you. Make beautiful mewsic together!

Drape yourself over her lap while she’s eating noms and watching TV. Help her eat the noms. If she’s extra soft around the middle, sneeze all over her noms so she won’t eat them and lose extra softness. She will thank you.

If he’s dressed up to go out to dinner, rub extra hard around his legs. Be sure to distribute your fur evenly so he won’t stop thinking of you all evening. Plus the hoomon he’s with will be able to enjoy you, too.

Gifts-giving doesn’t have to be expensive. While dead mice and lizards are so last year, unless you’re Choupette Lagerfeld, Tommaso, or Tardar Sauce aka Grumpy Cat, you’re not expected to shop for your hoomon at Tiffany’s or OliveGreenDog.com  (although I highly recommend their Roach Rods and Marbled Boiled Wool Balls).

Dori’s Top Gift Suggetions for Hoomons:

Beloved old catnip mousie that you no longer want cuz it stinks.

A fat, juicy, live spider you found in the bathroom.

That lost diamond earring you hid under the sofa last year.

Help her cook dinner noms:

Or maybe she needs a mew lamp:

While it’s the thought that counts, presentation is very important. Be sure to wrap your gift in purrty red paper with hearts and a bow.

I hope some of my suggestions are helpful. And if they are, remempurr to tell everyone that it was me who thought of it first. Until next time…

Have a Wonderpurr Valentine’s Day.

I hope yoo get everything you deserve.

 

 

Sherlock Herms in Mrs. Shallowford’s Ghost – The Conclusion

Previously on Sherlock Herms – The Case of Mrs. Shallowford’s Ghost Mrs Shallowford's Ghost

After watching Dori make her singing debut at The Desert Galaxy nightclub, Herman wakes up to realize he’s had a bad dream. Not that Dori’s singing was terrible, but that he was inside the almost famous detective Max Shallowford’s body, and the mobster Sammy ‘The Squid’ Calamari was expecting him to shoot another mobster.

Upon waking, Herman finds himself back in his attic office seventy years in the past. And seated across from him is Charley Feeble, a ghost. Charley tells him he is the real Max Shallowford, but has a pathological form of shyness. Because he feared meeting his clients in person, he hired an out of work actor from Ecum Secum, Nova Scotia to pretend to be Max Shallowford.

The actor was really good. Too good. He fooled everyone, including Charley, by taking over and getting involved with the mob. That landed him in trouble and he ended up disappearing, along with the mobster’s money and his girlfriend. The Squid was more upset about the money than the girlfriend.

The actor also married a showgirl by the name of Vivian who was responsible for scaring Charley to death. He tells Herman, “I called you, Sherlock Herms, to retrieve the missing jewelry so Vivian will stop screaming. She still frightens me, even though I’m dead. However, I now realize that if I can get her to step outside of my house, I may have a way to prevent her from reentering. That’s why I needed you, Herman. I need you to help me get rid of Vivian Shallowford.”

And now…The Conclusion.

SHERLOCK HERMS DIVIDER

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Sherlock Herms in Mrs Shallowford’s Ghost – Part 5

Previously on Sherlock Herms – The Case of Mrs. Shallowford’s Ghost Mrs Shallowford's Ghost

After Sherlock Herms enjoys a play break with his sisfur-slash-assistant, Detective Dori, he falls asleep and dreams he’s at the Desert Galaxy casino, seated at a table with Loud Lady and her Not Friend, Elouise. They are joined by the notorious gangster, Sammy ‘The Squid’ Calamari, who was rumored to be responsible for the mysterious disappearance of the almost famous hardboiled detective Maxwell Shallowford.

Just as Herman realizes he’s not a cat in his dream, but rather inside Max Shallowford’s body, The Squid gives him a briefcase filled with thousands of dollars. He tells Herman-slash-Max that he is to ‘plug’ another gangster by the name of Lenny the Loser.

Herman is quietly freaking in his navy pinstripe suit pants and his two tone shoes when he notices a man at the next table, glowing. Yup. Glowing like the sun is shining brightly down on top of his balding head. He tells Herman not to be afraid, and introduces himself. He’s Charles Feeble. Dori’s Charley! He also tells Herman, in order for him to understand what happened to Max Shallowford, he is experiencing a memory from the detective’s life. Herman wants to know who he is. Herman has many questions, but Charley tells him…

“That’s not important right now. When you awake, I will explain. But for now, let’s enjoy the show. Shall we?” He abruptly stood up to applaud, along with Sammy Calamari and the rest of the people at the nightclub.

“And now,” a voice said over a loud speaker, “please welcome to the Desert Galaxy… Miss Adora Purr singing her new hit song, Purrple Underpants!”

Herman swings his gaze to the bandstand where he sees his little sisfur step on stage.

What the Friskies!

And now…Part 5.

SHERLOCK HERMS DIVIDER Read More

Sherlock Herms: The Case of the Dancing Ghosts – Part 2

Previously on Sherlock Herms…The Case of the Dancing Ghosts…Sherlock Herms 1st caper cover CROPPED

When we last left our hero, Herman TattleCat – the dashing hardboiled detective with grit in his blood – he had just opened the Wonderpurr Detective Agency and had been hired to take his first case. However, he had concerns about the location of the case, as he didn’t have purrmission to leave the yard. That’s when his brofurs, Opie and Jack, arrived with Herman’s Gen7Pets stroller…with slight modifications…along with a nylon cat play tunnel that was said to be a trans-portal.

Accompanied by his sisfur –the beautiful though uncoordinated Adorapurr aka Dori – Herman climbed into his tricked out stroller, and pressed the H on his collar to the H on the control panel with a scary array of glowing buttons, including a pretty pink one that had Dori mesmerized. After Dori meowed the address and pawed the appropriate button, Herman’s Ride began to shake like a wet dog. Before them the nylon tunnel glowed in the attic’s shadowy darkness. Herman thought it looked like it was growing bigger…or maybe he and Dori were shrinking. Either way, his Ride was rolling toward it, as though being sucked inside.

While Dori freaked out – “Haalllp! We are being eaten!” – Herman zipped the stroller’s hood into place just as Opie and Jack returned, waving their paws. Despite the bouncing and the blurring Herman can see the fur on their backs standing straight up.

“Stop!” Jack yowled. “I forgot to tell you—” Then he was gone. And Opie was gone.

Everything was gone!

And now…Part 2

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Sherlock Herms in His 1st Big Caper: The Case of the Dancing Ghosts

My name is Sherlock Herms. It is my business to know what others don’t know. At least that’s what I hoped for once I got my paws wet as a private investigator. It was my first day on the job.

The Wonderpurr Detective Agency had been open for business all of twenty minutes, but my phone hadn’t rung once. I flicked my floofy tail with impatience. How long would I have to wait before someone hired me to solve a caper?

It all began a couple nights ago when Mom and I were wide awake cuz Dad was snoring Classic 70’s rock songs in his sleep. We ended up in front of the TV watching a documentary on famous detectives. Mom told me to pay close attention. She had decided to write mysteries. She seemed pretty set on doing it. That made me nervous.

I’m her mews, you see. I inspire her when she writes novels. I even starred in FINDING MYA for her. But how could I inspire her when I know nuffin’ about solving mysteries? If I fell down on the job, she might ask my arch-nemesis to be her mews. He’s a chunky orange tabby named Opie. He’s also my brofur.

With that in mind, I paid close attention to the documentary featuring Sam Spade, Philip Marlowe, Mike Hammer, Dick Tracy, Charlie Chan, and the husband and wife team, Nick and Nora Charles. My purrrsonal favorites were Spade and Marlowe for their hardboiled detective lingo, and Sherlock Holmes for his use of logical reason to solve cases. Plus I liked his hat. Read More

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